Come on, Really?

Is there some written law that states to be nominated to the Supreme Court of the United States of American one has to be horribly ugly? Noticing how pig-faced Elena Kagan is, I decided to navigate myself to the Supreme Court website and peruse through the photographs of the current justices and noticed, yes, they are all fugly. Besides poor Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Elena has to be the ugliest. Yes, I'm including her because she will be confirmed soon much to my dismay. There's something I don't trust about her, but I can't put my finger on it. No, it's not the fact that she prefers to eat pussy. "I don't agree with the 'Don't Ask Don't Tell' policy." Seems fishy to me, although with her love of vagina, she'd probably eat it.

I just had the pleasure to watch the dash cam video from the West Memphis officer shootings, although I don't know why I did, even though I'm sure it will be on Region 8 News this evening. If you haven't watched it, have no fear, you can't see those poor men actually shot. Yes, you do see one lying on the ground dead, which is a bit un-nerving but I do see dead people often working in a hospital so I wasn't that shocked. I really feel sorry for the families of these two men, though. I hope that they don't have to watch the video.

In household news, Liesel is still bleeding from her cooch. The last time she had her period was around the same time mother burnt her house down. She bled for OVER 3 WEEKS! I don't know if it was the stress of having the family staying with us or what. Well, she's been going now for 2 weeks and while it hasn't been that much of a problem, it became one today. Liesel wears these cute little denim panties in which we place a human maxi pad. I chose heavy flow because that's what she has every day. I ran out of them last night. I had told the pharmacist to bring home some yesterday since he works right inside the place you buy such things. Well, as usual, he forgot. So Liesel is without and I can't make myself get ready to go to the store and buy feminine pads for my dog. What would I do, get on the phone and say, "Yes, I'm buying Liesel's puppy pads right now," as I'm checking out? I don't feel like dealing with that mess. So, I'm dealing with Liesel's mess. She has 3 pairs of her washable panties and I'm allowing her to just wear them and I'll wash them later. The sucky part is that Jesse is working at the Blytheville pharmacy today because apparently nobody wants to work over in that town anymore, though I can't imagine why, cough, cough, and he won't be home till late! I don't care cause I'm not going to the Dollar General down the road anyway.

Today's Chinese discussion involves diapers. About half of the Chinese population choose not to use disposable diapers for their children. They do, however, slit holes in their kid's pants crack so that when the kids do go to the bathroom it will come right out. They simply squat the kid wherever they are and let them take care of their business. Yes, poop, pee, whatever. One thing odd is that they start potty training at 8 months! Can you believe it?!? That's something we should do. And it's not only the youngsters that pee and poo everywhere. Grownups do too. I saw more pee and poo on the Great Wall of China that I did in a parking garage near Beale Street during the Beale Street Music Festival.

Later bitches!!!

Lazy Monday Afternoon

What a great weekend! I attended a couples shower honoring Clay & Shannon for their upcoming wedding and enjoyed seeing old friends again. It rained a little here in the southern part of Jonesboro but not enough to matter. I watered the lawn, yet again, yesterday and found myself discouraged that I am destroying the environment to ensure that my lawn looks the best in the neighborhood. CWL, the company that supplies our water, has suggested, after a recent day of water usage, that houses with odd number addresses, which we fall under, water only on Wednesday, Friday and Sunday. So, I'm going to at least stick to that plan and hopefully help the environment a bit. However, it would be nice if the environment would give us a little rain in return. The sky is cloudy as of right now so hopefully it will rain the afternoon and not pass us just to the north or south as previously.

My three children spent the morning having an orgy. Taco, who is fixed, tried having sex with Barkley, who is also fixed, as Barkley tried having sex with Liesel, who is coming off of her period. I, meanwhile, vacuuming tthe floors with my Dyson as Reggie vacuumed the carpet with, well, himself.

I've been pestering Jesse to move recently as I am getting quite bored sitting at home doing nothing and do need a new project. I'm sure that I will not get my way until next year when he will break down and let me buy what I want. I actually had him inside a new construction the weekend before he purchased his overly expensive truck. With that purchase, my dreams were smashed. Oh, well. I'll just finish decorating the Master Suite and start on the Study.

I'm off to watch some televison. Sorry that I don't have much interesting to discuss today, my brain is mush. Until next time...

TV & My Life

I used to talk a lot about television in my blogs. However, I have not done so as of late. So, I thought I would catch you up on all the crap that I watch. I have a strong feeling that I don't watch as many television shows as one of my friends does, who shall remain nameless, as she told me once that she didn't want to get involved in another new series because she already had to devote so much time to the ones she already watched.

Most recently, my new favorite television show has been Justified. I'm loving this blossoming of Southern drama series. Memphis Beat premiered last night and I started it but decided to record it and watch this afternoon while I'm home alone and have nothing to do.
Of course I love the Real Housewives series and watch every episode of NY and NJ. Atlanta will be returning later this summer. Also on Bravo, I have to watch Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D List, Top Chef DC, and Bethenny Getting Married.
Over on USA, I love, love, love Royal Pains. And on sister network WE I can't miss My Fair Wedding.
On HGTV it's all about Design Star even though I haven't had time to watch this past Sunday's episode.

As for the television series in which I eagerly wait for a return are Nurse Jackie, Parenthood (my favorite network drama), Project Runway, Big Love, Flipping Out (coming in August, finished filming Monday), Dexter, and RuPaul's Drag Race. I really hope that no other television series begin that I want to watch because I won't have the time.

Today's China discussion involves television as well. CCTV is the main provider of television in China and is government controlled, surprise. So, when you turn on the television, most stations are CCTV; for example, CCTV1, CCTV2, etc.... In fact, CCTV constructed a beautiful new architectural masterpiece for their new headquarters. However, before the adjoining tower opened which was to house a Mandarin Oriental Hotel, the building caught fire during a Chinese New Year's celebration and destroyed that tower. You can see the CCTV building on the right although Google it for a better picture to see how striking the building really is. Safety was of concern so the CCTV building cannot be occupied. Just like the Chinese to spend a ton of cash and not use something. Alas, because tourism is blossoming at a huge rate there are some English channels however they are nothing that you would ever watch such as CNN International which cares more about events in Europe and the Middle East than the good old USA. So, if you plan on visiting China, take a computer with DVD player or prepare not to watch and video/tv while there.

That's all for today. Until tomorrow.

Cleaning

I clean my house immaculately every Friday whether it needs it or not. And with 3 dogs living in the house, plus it being a new house in a new neighborhood with lots of dust flying it needs it. However, every-other-day I try to vacuum. I stick to the concrete floors and let my robot (Reggie) vacuum the floors with carpeting. The only rooms that have carpet are the bedrooms and Reggie can get underneath the bed and tables and such, something I cannot do without moving said items. He's fun to watch, in fact I'm watching him do his magic right now. Here is a picture of him working:
The best part is that when he's done and tired, he drives himself back to his home to recharge!

So as for this cleaning jazz, I've been hounded by a certain pharmacist for months now to hire someone to do the cleaning so I won't have to. Well, there's a few problems with this scenario. First, he did find someone, but it was one of his employees and I didn't think that it would be such a good idea since I'm so picky (have you seen Jeff Lewis on "Flipping Out"? Well, that's me, no, not an imitation of me, that's me in every degree; well, without the lips). I asked a couple of friends and they told me that they both, who don't know each other, have Hispanic women who clean their houses, go figure. One of them actually hired an illegal, although she didn't know it until her husband, who recommended the women, told her. I just can't see myself being happy with anyone cleaning my house perfectly the way that I clean. I would have to fire a lot of people, I'm afraid. So for now the robot and I will tackle it. I really enjoy cleaning actually, especially the feeling after my house is spotless, until someone comes home, that is. And it's not like I'm doing anything all summer anyway.

So, today's China discussion involves cleanliness. That country is so filled with smog it's awful. Here's a picture from our hotel room in Beijing in the early morning. You can't see the buildings a few blocks away.
After 2 days, I felt like I was smoking a carton of cigarettes each day, and I don't smoke. No wonder so many people walk around with those surgical masks on in China. There was one day with blue skies. It had rained during the night and washed away the smog. That lasted until noon. Note to self: when returning to China, smoke cigarettes for a month before going to acclimate self.

That's all for today! Happy Birthday pharmacist! I love you! Until next time...

Liesel

My baby girl Liesel started her period today. We got lucky last year because she didn't have one until she was 1 year old. But when she did, over the holidays, it was a gusher. I was taking the sheets off the bed this morning to wash them when I noticed 3 red spots. Blah. Poor baby is wearing her denim panties now with heavy flow pads. She's dragging herself around the house and can't quit pacing. She goes outside and sits and comes back in. She does this over and over and over. Then, since it's hotter that hammered Hell, she lays on the concrete flooring on her side. I feel so bad for her. :(

I am so sick of watering my yard only to see that it isn't helping. I water a part of it each day. There are 3 high spots in the backyard that are crispy. I really need to inquire on a sprinkler system. The new tree isn't doing so well either. I water that damn thing several times each day and it's leaves won't quit drooping. The professionals came to look at it the other day and said it needed water. No shit?!?

I'm simultaneously watching the news and Ryan Vaughan said that the coldest high for the next 7 days will be 97 on Tuesday. I want to punch that bastard in his face. I'm glad he will be on vacation next week. He could at least lie and say we are going to be under a Winter Storm Warning. Hell, I wouldn't mind if we were under a Tornado Warning. Then it would mean that it's about to rain. It hasn't rained at my house in weeks.

Today's China discussion, the Great Wall. If you have ever visited the Grand Canyon you can understand my view of the Great Wall. Once you see the Grand Canyon and have been there for about 5 minutes, you are over it. It's amazing but that amazement doesn't last long. The Great Wall is very much the same. Couple that with the fact that the Chinese really don't care to keep the wall tidy as it is littered with piss (people will squat and piss anywhere on the damn thing that they choose) and trash (there are several vendors who bring drinks and snacks to the wall and sell them from the top; oddly enough the thing they want to sell the most is beer, and no there is no drinking age in China).

I'm off to shower and prepare myself for dinner. Hope you all have a fabulous weekend. Stay cool!

It Just Seems Odd to Me

Apparently, tomorrow morning at 2 a.m., an inmate in Utah who was convicted of murder will be put to death through the use of a firing squad. The killer was sentenced to death after he shot another man. Now, I've always been supportive of the death penalty and have often mentioned that those convicted of awful crimes should be treated exactly as they treated their victims. However, this firing squad scenario seems odd to me. When I looked at my iPhone, I was allerted that it is indeed 2010 and not 1895. However, they are known for some crazy shit out in Utah. What I found more odd was that the convicted murderer picked this form of execution. Give me the lethal injection anyday. I just want to go to sleep and never feel it. I mean, what if they miss and hit him in the lung or something else?

Since capital punishment was reinstated by the United States Supreme Court in 1976, this will be the 3rd time this act of execution has been performed, each time in Utah. At least 9 others on Utah's death row would like to die in this manner. However, a law passed in 2004 banned this form of punishment in Utah, but it is not retroactive. So, only 2 of those remaining on death row can choose this punishment. Apparently, this murderer will be placed in a chair in an execution chamber and a target will be pinned over this heart. He may choose to have a black hood placed over his head.

As with yesterday, today's China discussion will follow the same lines as my main discussion. China is a very safe country. While I was there, I never once felt threatened while we were walking alone (Jesse and I) in the streets at night. Maybe it was the officers posted on the street corner holding semi-automatic weapons. Most probably it was due to the fact that people are terrified to commit crimes. When a person is sentenced to death in China, the punishment is carried out within a year. Everything from corporate crime to drug trafficking to rape to murder is punishable by death. Some are executed by firing squads but the main course of action involves a single bullet to the head which may entail several onlookers present. I think China has something on us here. As of now, there 27 people have been executed in the state of Arkansas. However, there are 42 on death row here. China doesn't have the problem of over-populated prisons. They have the problem of over-population in general. Maybe this fast execution method can be adopted in the U.S. to clear out our growing prison population.

That's all for now. I have to return Sophie to her parents today and I must say that I will miss the little angel. Talk to you bitches tomorrow!

Does anyone care?

I started thinking today, while watching yet more of the continuing Gulf oil spill coverage, does anyone care about Haiti anymore? I mean Anderson Cooper spent weeks there after the earthquake reporting while simultaneously wearing Prada and Gucci T-shirts. Now the gray-haired hottie is reporting from the Gulf nightly. It seems that we are in a new news cycle. To be honest, I was done with the trials and tribulations of the Haitians.

Now, I am sick of the Gulf shit! Why don't we just understand a few simple things about the situation: BP cares about nothing but making a profit. As a public company, that's their job, get over it. The United States government is headed by an idiot who has several idiots working for and around him. You think George W. was unprepared for Katrina? Wait until some massive infrastructure destroying act of God occurs to see how this ill prepared dumbass reacts. Finally, I could give a shit about the Gulf of Mexico. In my opinion, it's a just a step above Lake Norfork, a giant swirling cesspool filled with feces, trash, and now oil. Don't get me wrong, I do feel awful for the animals. But that's about it. As long as the globs of oil stay away from the Virgin Islands (where I'm crusing this Fall) I'll be fine.

Jesus Christ it's hot. I hate all you bastards who constantly wish for summer. Summer sucks a big dick in my opinion. Give me Alaska any day! I would like to move to a climate that stays below 60 degrees year-round. Get over this summer shit folks. Crocs and flip-flops look like hell.

I'm keeping my mother's dog Sophie while they are in Hot Springs. I must say that having 4 dogs inside the house isn't much different than have 3. I've decided that once you pass the third it's all the same. When we move out of the city I'm going to have several animals. I'm most excited about having goats. Yes, goats. They are just so damn adorable. Screw horses; the damn things sweat and that makes me sick.

Today's China discussion: The city of Beijing regulates air-conditioning. While we were in China during May, temperatures soared into the upper 80's. Well, since it was not time for the government to allow air conditioning yet, we roasted. One member of our group called the front desk to complain that her air wasn't working only to be told that she needed to open the window. I hope to hell they get over that soon!

That's all for todays ramblings. If you disagree with anything I type, suck a big one. It's my blog, get your own!

A bit of a change

Where the hell have you been?, you might ask. Well, to tell the truth, I have been to China and back. I was one busy little sucker the past few months but all of that is behind me now. It is now my goal to return to the blogging that I once loved. Below you will find a list of reasons, although not complete, for my absence:

Twitter. Twitter is my thing. I really, really enjoy it for 2 reasons; 1.) It's where I get my news. All of the interesting news stories are twatted to twitter so I know what is going on when it happens. 2.) It's not facebook. I can see what other people are doing without being invited to join Farmville or Fuckville or whatever the hell is going on. Truth be told, I only log into Facebook to play Family Feud. I'm adicted to that shit; thanks Sarah! In short, I spend my time twatting what I am doing on Twitter and don't have to sit down and tell you what's going on, b/c you already know via Twitter. And for you facebook people, my twitter automatically posts to facebook.

School. I finally graduated from that damn school. I started ASU almost 11 years ago and it took me 6 fuckin years to get my degree. And the shitty part is that I'm going back this fall. Yay!!! I'm a fruitcake. Call Art because I do need a reservation at the nuthouse.

China. I toured all over that damn country for 10 days. Let me tell you, 10 days is a long vacation anywhere but for China it's an eternity. I'll tell you all about my little trip to the Orient over the next several blogs. There's so much to talk about that I decided that I would tell one interesting thing per day. Today, we are going to discuss the toilets. All of the cities that we visited were very westernized. For the most part, there was a choice of western toilet (ours) and eastern toilet (theirs). I found several things odd about their toilets. The first was that they preferred to use their toilet over ours. The damn things are squatters. Here's a pic:

The second odd thing was that the damn thing was made of porcelain and had a tank. Why not just make western toilets? It's the same thing without a pedestal to sit the bowl on. Everywhere we went, the squatters were nasty. If you are a lady, I feel for you if you have to go in China and there isn't a western toilet.

That's all for now. I'm hot as hell in my office and hungry too. Talk to y'all later!